5 Ways to Lead a More Fulfilling Life

 

At some point in our life, we’ve all asked the question, “Is this it? Was I put on this planet just to pay bills, work long hours and never have enough time in my busy schedule to have fun?”

If you ever felt like the opportunity to live a fulfilling life was passing you by, you are not alone. A few years back I remember feeling this way soon after I received a significant promotion. Although the new assignment came with more money and a better title, I no longer did the work that I was passionate about.

On top of feeling dispassionate, the job required longer hours. Longer days impacted quality family time, gym days became infrequent and my eating routines fell by the wayside. This is not what I envisioned as an ideal way to live my life and new I had to make a change. I’m sure you can relate to a time in your life when it felt like you were going through the motions with little room for passion and reward.

I often hear people say, “Once I get the ________ (raise, promotion, house, car, etc.), then I’ll be happy.” This way of thinking couldn’t be further from the truth. It actually prevents us from living life to the fullest.

However, the exact opposite is true. Focusing on creating a more fulfilling and happier life will actually increase our pay grade inside and out. Sound too good to be true?

Research has shown that satisfaction and fulfillment are key components to a successful career. Optimistic thinking leads to increased performance and accomplishment which sets us up for a more prosperous career.

Our brain performs best when we are in a positive mindset. When we feel optimistic about our future, we are more energized, focused and better problem solvers. On the other hand, when we are consumed with our problems, we are drained of our focus and energy needed to perform optimally. High performers add more value and thus take home bigger paychecks.

Living a meaningful and fulfilling life goes way beyond the monetary gains. It centers us on becoming the best version of ourselves. Leading a happier life allows us to show up more fully at home, work and in the community. As a result, we show up more powerfully as better parents, spouses, friends, and employees.

It’s never too late to start creating the life we want. We all have the power and everything needed to alter our destiny. The key to doing this successfully is letting go of all of our inhibitions so that we can start working toward building a life that we absolutely love every day.

If obstacles are getting in your way, here are five ways I used to start creating a more fulfilling life:

1. Keep Healthy

A healthy mind, body, and spirit is key. Treat yourself to the gift of your own attention by eating well, working out and meditating. All will help you increase optimal functioning.

2. Leave Your Comfort Zone

Seek out new opportunities. In the process, your confidence will increase allowing you to take more healthy risks. Transformation only happens beyond your comfort zone.

3. Stop Complaining

Complaining reinforces a negative state of mind and offers no solutions. Take ownership of your happiness. Next time you feel frustrated, take a few deep breaths and focus on something positive.

4. Show Your Gratitude

Write a thank you card, pick up the phone, volunteer or send someone a book they would enjoy. Tap into your heart and let others know how much you appreciate them.

5. Be Valuable

Instead of focusing on your personal success, focus on being of value. Bringing value to a relationship, business or community increases abundance and fosters reciprocity – the more you give, the more you receive.

Are you ready to create a life where you wake up energized and excited about the day ahead?

You have everything that it takes to create a life complete with happiness, abundance, and fulfillment. Looking back that promotion actually was an opportunity in disguise that transitioned me to a life beyond my wildest dreams. You can do the same. These are five ways that will help you on your journey in achieving your own happiness and fulfillment.

The Morning Routine That Will Change Your Life

 

Are you a skeptic? Do you find all the reports of a morning routine improving your motivation hard to believe? Would you rather hit that snooze button again? Do you wonder how having a morning routine could affect your motivation?

I know, it sounds like a lot of hype but there are scientific facts that support the theory that a morning routine can affect your motivation. Everyone’s morning routine does of course vary in one aspect or another, but there are three major ways that a morning routine can affect your motivation.

But first, how would you define motivation? According to Mullins (2002), motivation is a person’s driving force to succeed and achieve a goal, fulfill a need or even uphold a value. Needs are the basic force of survival, physical or psychological for example friendship, hunger, love, and thirst. Values are those things we consider important, for example, family friends, health or wealth. Lastly, goals are the end results a person is working towards. Therefore, anything that affects these three areas would affect your motivation.

Having defined the term motivation, it becomes much easier to clarify how a morning routine can affect your level of motivation. Maintaining a morning routine can give benefits to your mental (needs), physical (value) and productive (goals) well-being as explained below.

Productivity and Focus

Mornings are when people are more focused. By getting up in the morning and following a routine to begin your day, arranging the hardest tasks for the beginning of the day, you are organizing your day to follow your natural bodies rhythm. This increases your motivation and productivity. So often with a heavy work schedule, it feels hard to find time for yourself. By structuring your morning to include 5-10 minutes intervals dedicated to taking care of yourself, you will increase your motivation and show up more powerfully throughout your day. Some of the things that you can do with this time are meditate, journal, exercise, read and eat breakfast.

Mental Benefits

A morning routine that mostly includes waking up tired after repeatedly hitting that snooze button can invariably leave you rushing around trying to get ready for work and leave you with the feeling that you are never on top of things. The heightened stress levels this creates can make even the simplest of tasks seem hard. This, in turn, can leave you feeling more depressed and fed-up which lowers your will to work harder and your levels of motivation.

Whereas having a morning routine that gives your morning structure takes away the stress and worry of achieving everything that must be done. You know you will have time for the shower, the cup of coffee, or quiet read, which in turn leaves you feeling happier and more relaxed. This lessens depression, giving a sense of motivation and increases a feeling of satisfaction and achievement at completing the day’s tasks. A healthy mind and a happy disposition increase your motivation and productivity levels.

Physical Benefits

A morning routine that includes you racing out of the house without breakfast or running to catch the bus can leave you feeling fatigued, hungry and lower your ability to concentrate. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, as it wakes up your metabolism, reduces the feeling of hunger and boosts energy levels.

Therefore, a morning routine that includes eating breakfast will leave you with reduced hunger levels and boosted energy levels. A ten-minute walk will increase those energy levels and a cool shower has been proven to increase alertness, the immunity system, circulation, help with weight loss, give stress relief and aid with muscle recovery. A healthy body and boosted energy levels increase your stamina and your will and motivation to succeed.

Everyone’s morning routine differs depending on a number of factors such as work hours, children and the type of person you are. The average adult needs 7-8 hours of sleep a night. By counting backward from the time you have set your alarm to determine a sleeping time, you can increase the chance of waking in the morning feeling rested. The time you set your alarm depends on how much time you need to get yourself ready (and children if you have them). Any morning routine should include, breakfast and 5-10 minutes of ‘My Time’. A cold shower and a 10-minute walk are also very beneficial. One of the biggest hindrances to motivation is tiredness, hunger, and stress. By redressing a morning routine to lower stress levels, reduce hunger and eliminate stress your level of motivation and determination to succeed will be increased.

Here is a morning routine that I use and help my clients with to create amazing results in their life. It is called the P.O.W.E.R Hour and it has revolutionized their productivity, focus, and sense of fulfillment throughout their day:

P-eace- Dedicate the first 10-20 minutes of your day to some form of quiet time like meditation and expression of gratitude. Give yourself the gift of your own attention when you wake up.

O-penness- Take 5-10 minutes to journal about your intentions in your day

W– Who, What, Why= I ask these questions every morning and include them in my journal. Who needs me today? What do I need to do? WHY am I about to do the things I set out to do?

E-xercise- If you don’t make it to the gym, dedicate at least 10-15 minutes to some kind of movement, stretching, yoga or workout.

R– eading- Take time to read something and stimulate your mind as you prepare for your day. Another alternative is to listen to an audiobook, podcast or TED Talk.

Try out the P.O.W.E.R Hour over the next 30 days and see how it changes your attitude, productivity, and fulfillment.

Don’t forget to send me an email or tweet me to let me know how it’s going.

This article originally appeared in Huffington Post.

The Live Your Legacy Mastermind & Group Coaching Community

Live Your Legacy poster

“If you want something new, you have to stop doing something old” ~Peter Drucker

Join today and become part of an online community of inspiring leaders that will help you achieve more, become more accountable and support your BIG goals.

Each month we will focus on a different leadership skill that you can use to create freedom, abundance, and prosperity in your life.Our first Masterclass begins tonight and the program has ongoing enrollment.

Click here to learn about membership:

Masterminds are used by mostly all of the most successful and prosperous people in the world.

  • How does a mastermind work? A group of smart people come together to tackle challenges, share resources and create prosperity in your life. They lean on each other, give advice, share connections and do business with each other when appropriate. If you are lucky enough to get invited to one, you will most likely see a marked change in yourself and your business

Masterminds are incredible and can do wonders for your personal and professional success. Growing in a group is not only more effective, it’s more fun!

If that sounds interesting to you, keep reading.

In this Mastermind Group, you WILL achieve BIG RESULTS in less time with the support of other great leaders. 

Our focus is creating the freedom you want in your life and career.  Imagine having instant access to me and other people who can help make your dream a reality.

*The First Live Webinar will be on March 29th*

What’s In It For YOU?

  • Monthly Master Class
  • POWER Modules
  • E-motivators, audios, and/or videos
  • Weekly goal setting/accountability debrief tool
  • Monthly Modules and Activities
  • Peer accountability partners 
  • Access to our Secret Facebook Group
  • Part of a growing community of inspiring leaders
  • Customized Personal Development Plan

You also get this…

Here’s a couple of additional benefits you receive from being part of a Mastermind Group. The expertise you want at your fingertips.

For example:

  • Looking to create financial freedom- we have someone who can help you
  • Looking to build a side hustle- we have someone who can show you how
  • Need a website built? We have someone in our community.
  • Want to be a professional speaker? We have someone in our community.
  • Looking to change careers? We have someone in our community.
  • Want to write a book? We have someone in our community.
  • Need help to start that business? We have someone in our community.

If that’s not enough, there’s more…

In addition, I will be hosting a monthly Master Class and a Group Coaching Call that digs deeper into some of the principles and mindsets that create success (Accountability, Habits, Routines, Owner/Victim, Creating a Team, etc).

Invest in your future today?

Register TODAY!

We have three different levels of membership (Silver, Gold, Platinum).

Our silver membership package costs less than a cup of coffee a day! Really? YES!!!

Don’t put your dreams on hold any longer, now is your time! Give yourself the gift of your own attention and invest in yourself

Learn More: register today!

Looking forward to having you in this amazing community!

Live Your Legacy poster

Don’t Treat Your Life Like A Gym Membership

group of young people running on treadmills in modern sport gym

At the beginning of each year, we tend to have a long list of new goals and resolutions that we set out to accomplish. Most of us feel like the new year is the perfect time to make the changes in our life that will allow us to achieve more.

Would you be surprised to know that 25% of people will quit within the first month of setting a new year’s resolution? 

The problem isn’t that people set goals, it’s how they structure it.

If you belong to a gym or fitness center you probably know what I mean. Right now, gyms are so full that it’s hard to get a treadmill or a 25-pound dumbbell.

When you come back to the gym in a few weeks your experience will be quite different. 80% of the New Years Resolution gym crowd drops off by the second week of February. They actually bank on this and sell memberships knowing that only 1 in 5 people will actually show up.

Why is that?

Because people are not structuring their goals in a way that is sustainable.

As you think about the first month of 2016, ask yourself these three questions:

1) Where am I with my goals?

2) Is my daily routine structured to optimize time for my priorities (goals)?

3) Do I find myself losing momentum?

Let’s make sure that you continue to grow and prosper throughout the year.

Here are three ways to ensure you achieve more this year:

1) Choose your number wisely– The optimal number of goals to set for any given year is somewhere between 6-9. I’ve found this to be the range where most of my clients flourish.

2) Goal Stacking- Instead of trying to tackle all of your goals at once try starting with one goal at a time. In January, you may add going to the gym, and in February a financial goal and so on. This allows for you give each goal the focus and commitment necessary for sustainable success.

3) Accountability- find an accountability partner that will help you get started and keep you on track when you hit roadblocks. Often times, they are the spark that keeps you going through the rough patches. Accountability partners can be a paid coach, a childhood friend or someone you meet along the way.

You have everything it takes to make all of your goals become a reality this year. If you’ve found yourself losing steam lately, apply these three tools to give you the boost that you need.

I look forward to hearing about your continued success and breakthroughs in 2016!

5 Ways to Lead a More Fulfilling Life

Happy young African-American man isolated white background

At some point in our life, we’ve all asked the question, “Is this it? Was I put on this planet just to pay bills, work long hours and never have enough time in my busy schedule to have fun?”

If you ever felt like the opportunity to live a fulfilling life was passing you by, you are not alone. A few years back I remember feeling this way soon after I received a significant promotion. Although the new assignment came with more money and a better title, I no longer did the work that I was passionate about.

On top of feeling dispassionate, the job required longer hours. Longer days impacted quality family time, gym days became infrequent and my eating routines fell by the wayside. This is not what I envisioned as an ideal way to live my life and new I had to make a change. I’m sure you can relate to a time in your life when it felt like you were going through the motions with little room for passion and reward.

I often hear people say, “Once I get the ________ (raise, promotion, house, car, etc.), then I’ll be happy.” This way of thinking couldn’t be further from the truth. It actually prevents us from living life to the fullest.

However, the exact opposite is true. Focusing on creating a more fulfilling and happier life will actually increase our pay grade inside and out. Sound too good to be true?

Research has shown that satisfaction and fulfillment are key components to a successful career. Optimistic thinking leads to increased performance and accomplishment which sets us up for a more prosperous career.

Our brain performs best when we are in a positive mindset. When we feel optimistic about our future, we are more energized, focused and better problem solvers. On the other hand, when we are consumed with our problems, we are drained of our focus and energy needed to perform optimally. High performers add more value and thus take home bigger paychecks.

Living a meaningful and fulfilling life goes way beyond the monetary gains. It centers us on becoming the best version of ourselves. Leading a happier life allows us to show up more fully at home, work and in the community. As a result, we show up more powerfully as better parents, spouses, friends and employees.

It’s never too late to start creating the life we want. We all have the power and everything needed to alter our destiny. The key to doing this successfully is letting go of all of our inhibitions so that we can start working toward building a life that we absolutely love every day.

If obstacles are getting in your way, here are five ways I used to start creating a more fulfilling life:

1. Keep Healthy– A healthy mind, body and spirit is key. Treat yourself to the gift of your own attention by eating well, working out and meditating. All will help you increase optimal functioning.

2. Leave Your Comfort Zone– Seek out new opportunities. In the process, your confidence will increase allowing you to take more healthy risks. Transformation only happens beyond your comfort zone.

3. Stop Complaining– Complaining reinforces a negative state of mind and offers no solutions. Take ownership of your happiness. Next time you feel frustrated, take a few deep breaths and focus on something positive.

4. Show Your Gratitude– Write a thank you card, pick up the phone, volunteer or send someone a book they would enjoy. Tap into your heart and let others know how much you appreciate them.

5. Be Valuable– Instead of focusing on your personal success, focus on being of value. Bringing value to a relationship, business or community increases abundance and fosters reciprocity – the more you give, the more you receive.

Are you ready to create a life where you wake up energized and excited about the day ahead?

You have everything that it takes to create a life complete with happiness, abundance, and fulfillment. Looking back that promotion actually was an opportunity in disguise that transitioned me to a life beyond my wildest dreams. You can do the same. These are five ways that will help you on your journey in achieving your own happiness and fulfillment.

The Youth Sports Trophy Culture: It’s Not About Trophies It’s About Values

Close shoot of black happy smiling little boy holding prize cup with other kids cheering on the back

Are Participation Trophies Sending The Wrong Message To Our Children?

This past weekend one of my clients sent me an article and asked what I thought about Pittsburg Steeler Linebacker James Harrison having his children (ages 8, 6) return the “participation trophies” they received from one of their sports teams. Harrison posted the following on Instagram:

“I came home to find out that my boys received two trophies for nothing, participation trophies! While I am very proud of my boys for everything they do and will encourage them till the day I die, these trophies will be given back until they EARN a real trophy. I’m sorry I’m not sorry for believing that everything in life should be earned and I’m not about to raise two boys to be men by making them believe that they are entitled to something just because they tried their best…cause sometimes your best is not enough, and that should drive you to want to do better…not cry and whine until somebody gives you something to shut u up and keep you happy.”

As former college basketball player and someone who coaches fathers on how to perform at their highest level in life and business, my initial reaction was total support of the message. I never received a participation trophy growing up and was taught the same core values Mr. Harrison was teaching: Everything in life and sports should be earned. My default response was to return to my own experience as an athlete who worked his butt off to eventually earn a college scholarship. In large part because of my experiences growing up, I’ve come to realize how important it is to work hard, experience defeat and be able to learn and improve from losses and disappointments. These are lessons we can take into our everyday life as a parent, business owner, or someone trying to reach their full potential. It’s not defeat that defines us in life but how we react to it that creates our success moving forward. All important lessons I believe Mr. Harrison’s statement supports.

On the other side of the argument are those  believe participation trophies serve as source of pride and a self-esteem booster for kids. That children who participate and work their tails off all year need to be rewarded for finishing the season and not giving up on their team. This reward anchors a child’s experience and encourages them to show up and contribute to the collective.

A 2014 Reason-Rupe poll showed that the more successful adults are in life, the less likely they are to be in favor of the participation trophies. The poll found that the desire to withhold participation trophies increased with income, age, and education. For example, 55 percent of those making less than $30,000 a year were in favor of participation trophies, while only 23 percent of those at the top earners ($110,000 +) wanted trophies for all. It really isn’t about trophies, which by the way has skyrocketed into a 3 billion dollar a year business. The issue is really about instilling values and life lessons in our children that they can take off the field into the world.

It is important that we all take a deeper look at this discussion and see why there has been such a spirited debate over whether participation awards for children are healthy or not. I know parents who sometimes struggle to identify the fine line between appropriate praise and overcompensating by praising everything their child does. Behind Mr. Harrison’s statement is the bigger issue of how to best support our children (emotionally, psychologically) and prepare them for success in life.

Here are questions to consider:

Are participation trophies a way to improve and support positive self-esteem in a child?

OR

Are these types of awards part of a bigger problem that creates entitled and unmotivated adults?

In order to create a meaningful discussion that goes beyond who is right and wrong, I wanted to explore several different perspectives and then offer a potential solution to the issue at hand:

The Issue At Hand

How can we best set our children up for success in life (socially, emotionally, psychologically, financially, spiritually, etc.)?

Different Perspectives

Over the weekend, I made some calls and asked this question:

Is James Harrison right? Are participation trophies sending the wrong message to our children?

My first calls were to the professional and college athletes I work with who are also parents. Next I asked some of the high-performing fathers (business owners, CEO’s) who said they were either average, below average or non-athletic growing up.

Finally, I went to the people who this debate affects the most, children. I asked my own children (ages 13, 17) as well as some of their friends what they thought about the debate over participation awards. There are far too many instances in today’s society where adults and experts create a discussion about our children and youth without including them. This was an important perspective and their responses may surprise you.

All three perspectives were important for me to integrate into what I already know from my experience in child development, parenting and human behavior.

Here is what I’ve learned from everyone’s comments:

The “Yes” Argument

Participation trophies creates a false sense of accomplishment

“I wanted to give my children all they wanted, all I hadn’t had. In so doing I may have deprived them of what they needed most: the grit and the tools, to take on the world and make their own way.” Harry Belefonte

The professional athlete’s I spoke with whole-heartedly agreed with Harrison’s perspective. One stated, “Great job Mr. Harrison for teaching the value of hard work and that nothing in life comes easy.” As a father, I also want to instill in my children the importance of creating good habits, working hard towards a goal and giving your best. I agree with Mr. Harrison that teaching children the importance of earning things in life through hard work is a very important life lesson.

These are the times in our life when the most profound transformations take place because of defeat. Defeat and experiencing losing is important for development and has a way of getting our attention. It allows us to look at our habits, work ethic and performance to see where we can improve. If you never experience losing and are rewarded for simply showing up you may never learn this lesson of perseverance.

What I’ve noticed from observing the high performers I work with, whether its sports or business, is a sense of never settling for mediocrity. Winners in life, business and sports always feel that there is more to do. If business exceeds expectations in the first quarter, they want to top that in the second quarter. If the team wins a championship, they are quickly focusing on repeating the following year. In many ways, there is never satisfaction because there is always a bigger milestone to achieve.

The “No” Argument

Participation trophies teach children the value of showing up

“Sometimes the bravest and most important thing you can do is just show up” Brene Brown

The lesson that may have been missed in all of this is the value of showing up. One of the CEO’s I spoke with had a different take on the message the trophy sends. “By not giving a child a trophy after a long hard season teaches children that there is no value in trying. As Woody Allen once said, “80 percent of life is showing up.”

As a father who has coached many of my children’s teams over the years, I understand the hard work, dedication and commitment that a children (and parents) make to attending practices and games. Advocates for participation trophies argue that sending a child home after a long season empty handed sends the message that there is no value in the attempt. Sports can be a microcosm of life and teaching children that it’s bigger than winning or losing is important. By earning participation trophies, children receive the message that being accountable, showing up and working hard means something. Some children won’t be superstars or be fortunate enough to be on winning teams, but that doesn’t mean they’re not embodying winning values.

What the kids are saying

“Participation is more than just showing up”

When I asked my 13-year-old son and the players on his AAU basketball team, I was expecting them to be opposed to the trophies. These very competitive kids are always looking to win the next game and tournament. To my surprise, most of them (9 out of 10) were in favor of the trophies. They told me that they understand the difference between MVP, Championships and Participation Trophies and there is room for them all. The players went on to say that working hard and being committed during the season should be rewarded. WOW! I was impressed.

So, I called my 17-year-old daughter to see if she would have another view. A few days earlier, I had moved her into her dorm room for her first year of college. She spent most of her life on dance teams that participated in recitals and competition. Her view was similar to that of my son’s team. She said, “participation is more than just showing up, it’s agreeing to work to be part of a team. Whether we win or lose, it doesn’t take away our effort.” She continued to say that a criteria has to be met to receive it though. Things like attending practice, working hard and being a good teammate. Children get it and fully understand the distinction between a first place trophy and a participation trophy. As they schooled me, I wondered to myself if it was the adults, who were making this more complicated than it needed to be.

It’s Not about Trophies It’s about Values

“The major value in life is not what we get. The major value in life is what we become”

Most people are either on one side or on the other of this debate with no wiggle room for common ground. Participation trophies are either GOOD or BAD.

There is common ground between both sides of this debate that can ultimately benefit our children. The commonality is that everyone wants the best for their children, but we often go about it different ways.

As a student of child development, I also have to point out the research of Stanford Psychologist Carol Dweck who wrote a New York Times piece titled “Too much praise is not good for toddlers.” In her research, Dweck talks about the negative repercussions of praising children for everyday achievements. She doesn’t discourage praising kids altogether, but suggests focusing on how they approach difficult tasks, strategize and concentrate.

The adults may have missed what the the kids recognized all along: Participation is more than “just showing up.” Webster’s defines participation as “the state of being related to a larger whole.” Isn’t that a value we want to instill in our children? Teamwork, sacrifice, service and contributing to a greater good.

It reminded me of the college professor who on the first day of class announced, “You all start the year with A’s, and this is what you have to do to keep it.”

Maybe the answer is to place meaning and emphasis on values rather than a trophy. Sports can provide valuable life lessons to help our children develop into healthy adults:

1. Teamwork– Teamwork in sports fosters emotional and social development that can easily carry over to life. This translates in how well your children work with their teachers, classmates, relatives, and anyone else they may encounter in life.

2. Resilience- You will experience adversity in life but never give up. Everyone gets knocked down, but what’s important is how you respond.

3. Sportsmanship- Your character shouldn’t be determined by a win or loss. Show up in the world as the person you want to be.

4. Fun- Children do this much better than adults do. In sports and life, find what brings you joy. Follow your dreams and have fun with it.

5. Hard work- This is a valuable lesson that translates in all aspects of life.

6. Everyone has strengths- Teaching children to look for the strengths in other people is a great lesson in relationship building though connection and empathy.

7. Responsibility and Commitment- “No practice, No Play.” Sports help children understand the importance of following through with their commitment by attending practices and games. Being responsible for yourself and keeping your commitment to your teammates is a valuable life lesson.

So… Is James Harrison Right? Are participation trophies sending the wrong message to our children?

It depends… Trophies don’t send messages, PEOPLE do! 

Maybe we’ve been debating the wrong question and complicating the issue all along. Harrison’s points about earning things in life and dealing with adversity are great life lessons. I think it’s fair to challenge the second part of the statement “your best sometimes isn’t enough. When children give their best, it should be good enough.

Competition is at the heart of sports, and maybe trophies should be reserved for the winners, but everyone’s effort deserves to be acknowledged.

“The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday.”

Fatherhood Picture Of The Year Contest: And The Winner Is…..

First, I’d like to thank all the families who contributed to the Fatherhood Picture of the Year contest. It has been a huge success, as we received an overwhelming response of amazing pictures depicting modern day fatherhood.

Pictures were submitted by wives, husbands, children and friends, which made it all the more fun. The decision to choose a winner was extremely difficult, so I enrolled the help of my own children in the process.  Before I announce the winner, I’d like to personally thank and recognize all the fathers for being such great role models in the lives of your families.

And the WINNER is……..

All nine fathers below are the winners. Yes, that’s right, we have an 9-way tie. These submissions of our fathers in action were too good to pick just one winner.

Congratulations to all our fathers below. As promised, each winner will receive a FREE coaching session from me.

Here are our winning father’s:

Charles Jones shows that “proud papa” smile moments after the birth of his precious newborn

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Jeff Bogle sharing the sunshine with the light of his life

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURES

Darryl Mathis in the New York State of mind with his adorable children.

FullSizeRender

Rob Barea teaching his son that fatherhood is a marathon not a sprint

running

Jon Harrison and his son “May the force be with you”

classically trained

Jesse Foster shows what being an ambidextrous father looks like

jesse

Michael Vigneau riding the waves of life with his little ones

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Brian Henderson sharing creativity and endless possibilities with his daughter

museum

Brian Mininger with his own version of the “Fab 5”

brian mininger

Congratulations to all our winners…

Happy Father’s Day!!!

Father’s Day: 3 Things To Think About This Year

bandison fam

What an amazing Father’s Day weekend it has been already. It started out with Friday Pizza Night with my children and continued into Saturday at Brooklyn Bridge Park. We roller skated, played basketball and barbecued. But most importantly we laughed, talked and enjoyed each others company. Another opportunity to celebrate life as a family!

Father’s day is a celebration! A great celebration honoring the importance of a father’s influence on his family and society. Its origins date back to July 19, 1910 when the governor of Washington proclaimed the nation’s first “Father’s Day.”

While I am a big advocate of Father’s Day celebrations, I also understand that fatherhood is an everyday responsibility. As a father of three wonderful children and someone who works with fathers throughout the world, I’ve dedicated my life’s work to shifting the perspective of fatherhood.

In my TED Talk, at TEDx Boca Raton, titled “The Most Important Question A Father Can Ask Himself,” I addressed the importance and impact of fatherhood.

Here are three things to remember this year when celebrating Father’s Day:

Fathers Matter- Children with active fathers in their life perform better academically, behaviorally and socially.

Today’s Father is Present- Today’s father is more active in their children’s lives than at any other time in history. The amount of time the modern father spends with his children has tripled since 1965.

Fatherhood Is Leadership- “Like Leadership, Fatherhood isn’t about your authority, position or title. Fatherhood is about influence; how one life can influence another.” A father’s actions and example directly influence the lives of his children and family.

While you think of what present you want to buy your father this year, take the time and reflect on what his presence has meant to you and your family.

HAPPY FATHERS DAY!
From our family to yours

 

Fatherhood Leadership Academy

Fatherhood Leadership Academy blue

Are you a father that wants MORE?  

More freedom? More fulfillment? More time to do the things you love?

Are you a father who wants to be better?

Do you want to be a better leader? A better father? or BOTH?

Are you a high achiever who has found success in the business world but sometimes feel like you’re failing as a parent?

Did you set your goals and dreams aside when you became a father and no longer think they’re possible?

If the answer is YES… The Fatherhood Leadership Academy is for you!

Click here to learn more: Fatherhood Leadership Academy

Are You Living Your Default Future?

man try to exit from his glass sphere

Lets Stop For A Minute! Yes Stop….

Take a deep breath, check in with yourself and become present.

Ok, are you here?

Good…..

Now check in and see where you are on your journey called life! With almost half of 2015 behind us, now is a great opportunity to become aware of where you are in the here and now.

Have you reached the goals, dreams, and milestones that you had set for yourself? Are you satisfied, fulfilled and passionate with your life? Is what you are about to do today what you really want to do?

Or

Are you living your default future?

What is a default future you ask?

Your default future is that life you “settled” into. The one that has subtly placed your dreams to the side because “life showed up.” The vision of the life you really wanted for yourself that has been placed on a waiting list. It is that relationship, job, or situation that has now gone on auto pilot. Many people I work with begin to realize they have settled into their default future without even knowing when it happened.

Some have promised to go back to school after a year, and it’s 10 years later. Others have said they wanted to start their own business but continue to show up to a job they hate. Some wanted to have a healthier relationship with their body but never made it to the gym. You get the point.

We all have had opportunities in our life to either settle or move forward towards our ideal life.

Where are you?

The number one cause for this life on auto pilot is….Failure to leave your comfort zone

Yes, the dreaded comfort zone. Trust me when I tell you that your comfort zone is NOT your friend. Your comfort zone leads you to a one way ticket to your default future.

Comfort zones foster an attitude of learned helplessness, making progress harder. Learning, creating, and growing happen only when you step outside and challenge yourself.

“Life Begins At The End Of Your Comfort Zone”

Here are 3 Ways To Move Out Of Your Comfort Zone:

Lean In- Ever been working out at the gym and it hurts? Then you make a decision to lean in and continue working out despite the pain. What happens? The result is that you become fit, stronger and generally feel good about yourself. The discomfort was worth it. The same applies to your life. Lean in to discomfort. Choose to have that difficult conversation you’ve been putting off. Choose to apply for those jobs that you think you”ll never get. Choose to book put a date on the calendar and book the flight to your dream destination. Choose to write that book you’ve been putting off.

Become Present and Expand- Awareness can bring about change. When you become aware of your tendency to default to your comfort zone, shift your mindset to expansion. Ask yourself, what can I do that will broaden my horizons? Is it a 30-day challenge? Is it a conference you wanted to sign up for that will deepen your knowledge base? Is it an email to the author of the book you really connected with? These are all ways to expand.

Accountability- When leaving your comfort zone it’s important that your track your progress to ensure that you’re not subtly slipping back into old habits. Support yourself by creating an accountability group with friends. This can include gym workout buddies, a book club or a master mind.

Looking for deeper transformation? Consider hiring a coach or connecting with a mentor.

As you begin to move out of your comfort zone you will see opportunities that you thought were out of reach. This will build your confidence and allow you to take healthy risks.  I’ve seen miracles happen with the clients I’m fortunate enough to work with as a result of pushing past their comfort zone. Transformation in its truest sense. Leaving your comfort zone will create a life of increased fulfillment, optimism and confidence.

Make the decision today to get out of your comfort zone and live your ideal life, instead of your default future. Life is truly what you make it!