Procrastination Is Not A Thing…It’s A Story!

Slow service concept as a time clock with a shell shaped as a snail  as a metaphor for procrastination and leisurely customer service or being tired and sleepy symbol on a white background.

We’ve all said it at one point or another….”I’m a procrastinator” or “I haven’t finished yet because I’m procrastinating.”

People talk about it like it’s a fixed state or has somehow become our destiny. Sometimes it sounds like it has become a part of us. Like a not so powerful superhero…

“The Procrastinator”

But procrastination isn’t a noun, it isn’t a fixed state and it’s definitely not who we are.

Procrastination is a STORY

It’s a story that we have chosen to tell ourselves and tell others as a reason why we haven’t completed what we set out to accomplish.

Recently I’ve been working with my coaching clients on changing the stories they’ve created in their life that no longer serves them. They’ve discovered that most times, the root of becoming a “procrastinator” is fear. It becomes a built in excuse for why we don’t accomplish what we set out to do.

Full Definition of Procrastinate: transitive verb: to put off intentionally and habitually intransitive verb: to put off intentionally the doing of something that should be done

Dr. Steel Piers did extensive research on procrastination and published his findings in a book called The Procrastination Equation.

Take a second and think about what you have been putting off lately in the name of procrastination. Now I want you to assess how these four factors are showing up in that equation:

Expectancy- this is the level of confidence you have about your goal or what you want to do. People are often fearful that they won’t be successful so their expectancy is low which makes it easier to put it off.

Value- how fired up are you about completing the task or achieving the goal? If you aren’t motivated, think about the benefit of completing it (i.e peace of mind, better health, etc).

Impulsivity- how impulsive are you? Do you stop in the middle of a task or put it off to check email, facebook or send a text message? This is one of the major factors that keeps you in the procrastination story.

Delay- How many times have you said things like “I’ll do it after I watch some TV” or “this can wait until tomorrow.” This is the time to increase your expectancy and realize the value of completing this task RIGHT NOW!

Four Ways To Stop Procrastinating

Set goals- goal setting and creating small wins in your life increase and fuel your motivation. Make your goals challenging, meaningful, feasible and specific.
Just begin the process- focus on process goals rather than outcome goals. For example, instead of worrying about completing your 10-page paper all at once, shift to the process. Set a goal to write for 25 minutes today.

Focus to finish- set a timer for 25 minutes. Turn off all notifications, phones, and social media. Focus on one task for 25 minutes, then give yourself a 5-minute break. REPEAT. This is called the Pomodoro Technique.

Define you WHY- what is your goal behind the goal? Why are you doing what your about to do? Here is a great video by Simon Sinek on finding your Why.
You are not a procrastinator!!! That doesn’t have to be your story anymore!

Create a new story today by:

a) Assessing where you are on the on the procrastination equation.

b) Implementing the four steps I’ve laid out for you!

A new habit usually takes anywhere between 30 days to 245 days to create, averaging out at around 66 days. Starting today, try and implement the four steps above whenever you find yourself telling the procrastination STORY!

Remember it’s only a STORY and you are the author of YOUR STORY.

Change your story and change your life!

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High-Performance Coach and Fatherhood Thought Leader Devon Bandison teaches business owners and entrepreneurs around the world how to achieve more at work, at home, and in the community. His coaching has been featured in the Wall Street Journal and he ‘s a contributing writer for the Huffington Post.

Learn about Live Your Legacy Mastermind Community Here: https://www.legacy.zone

Don’t Treat Your Life Like A Gym Membership

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At the beginning of each year, we tend to have a long list of new goals and resolutions that we set out to accomplish. Most of us feel like the new year is the perfect time to make the changes in our life that will allow us to achieve more.

Would you be surprised to know that 25% of people will quit within the first month of setting a new year’s resolution? 

The problem isn’t that people set goals, it’s how they structure it.

If you belong to a gym or fitness center you probably know what I mean. Right now, gyms are so full that it’s hard to get a treadmill or a 25-pound dumbbell.

When you come back to the gym in a few weeks your experience will be quite different. 80% of the New Years Resolution gym crowd drops off by the second week of February. They actually bank on this and sell memberships knowing that only 1 in 5 people will actually show up.

Why is that?

Because people are not structuring their goals in a way that is sustainable.

As you think about the first month of 2016, ask yourself these three questions:

1) Where am I with my goals?

2) Is my daily routine structured to optimize time for my priorities (goals)?

3) Do I find myself losing momentum?

Let’s make sure that you continue to grow and prosper throughout the year.

Here are three ways to ensure you achieve more this year:

1) Choose your number wisely– The optimal number of goals to set for any given year is somewhere between 6-9. I’ve found this to be the range where most of my clients flourish.

2) Goal Stacking- Instead of trying to tackle all of your goals at once try starting with one goal at a time. In January, you may add going to the gym, and in February a financial goal and so on. This allows for you give each goal the focus and commitment necessary for sustainable success.

3) Accountability- find an accountability partner that will help you get started and keep you on track when you hit roadblocks. Often times, they are the spark that keeps you going through the rough patches. Accountability partners can be a paid coach, a childhood friend or someone you meet along the way.

You have everything it takes to make all of your goals become a reality this year. If you’ve found yourself losing steam lately, apply these three tools to give you the boost that you need.

I look forward to hearing about your continued success and breakthroughs in 2016!

Fatherhood Picture Of The Year Contest: And The Winner Is…..

First, I’d like to thank all the families who contributed to the Fatherhood Picture of the Year contest. It has been a huge success, as we received an overwhelming response of amazing pictures depicting modern day fatherhood.

Pictures were submitted by wives, husbands, children and friends, which made it all the more fun. The decision to choose a winner was extremely difficult, so I enrolled the help of my own children in the process.  Before I announce the winner, I’d like to personally thank and recognize all the fathers for being such great role models in the lives of your families.

And the WINNER is……..

All nine fathers below are the winners. Yes, that’s right, we have an 9-way tie. These submissions of our fathers in action were too good to pick just one winner.

Congratulations to all our fathers below. As promised, each winner will receive a FREE coaching session from me.

Here are our winning father’s:

Charles Jones shows that “proud papa” smile moments after the birth of his precious newborn

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Jeff Bogle sharing the sunshine with the light of his life

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Darryl Mathis in the New York State of mind with his adorable children.

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Rob Barea teaching his son that fatherhood is a marathon not a sprint

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Jon Harrison and his son “May the force be with you”

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Jesse Foster shows what being an ambidextrous father looks like

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Michael Vigneau riding the waves of life with his little ones

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Brian Henderson sharing creativity and endless possibilities with his daughter

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Brian Mininger with his own version of the “Fab 5”

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Congratulations to all our winners…

Happy Father’s Day!!!

Father’s Day: 3 Things To Think About This Year

bandison fam

What an amazing Father’s Day weekend it has been already. It started out with Friday Pizza Night with my children and continued into Saturday at Brooklyn Bridge Park. We roller skated, played basketball and barbecued. But most importantly we laughed, talked and enjoyed each others company. Another opportunity to celebrate life as a family!

Father’s day is a celebration! A great celebration honoring the importance of a father’s influence on his family and society. Its origins date back to July 19, 1910 when the governor of Washington proclaimed the nation’s first “Father’s Day.”

While I am a big advocate of Father’s Day celebrations, I also understand that fatherhood is an everyday responsibility. As a father of three wonderful children and someone who works with fathers throughout the world, I’ve dedicated my life’s work to shifting the perspective of fatherhood.

In my TED Talk, at TEDx Boca Raton, titled “The Most Important Question A Father Can Ask Himself,” I addressed the importance and impact of fatherhood.

Here are three things to remember this year when celebrating Father’s Day:

Fathers Matter- Children with active fathers in their life perform better academically, behaviorally and socially.

Today’s Father is Present- Today’s father is more active in their children’s lives than at any other time in history. The amount of time the modern father spends with his children has tripled since 1965.

Fatherhood Is Leadership- “Like Leadership, Fatherhood isn’t about your authority, position or title. Fatherhood is about influence; how one life can influence another.” A father’s actions and example directly influence the lives of his children and family.

While you think of what present you want to buy your father this year, take the time and reflect on what his presence has meant to you and your family.

HAPPY FATHERS DAY!
From our family to yours

 

Fatherhood Leadership Academy

Fatherhood Leadership Academy blue

Are you a father that wants MORE?  

More freedom? More fulfillment? More time to do the things you love?

Are you a father who wants to be better?

Do you want to be a better leader? A better father? or BOTH?

Are you a high achiever who has found success in the business world but sometimes feel like you’re failing as a parent?

Did you set your goals and dreams aside when you became a father and no longer think they’re possible?

If the answer is YES… The Fatherhood Leadership Academy is for you!

Click here to learn more: Fatherhood Leadership Academy

Making Headlines: The Fatherhood is Leadership Podcast

I wanted to thank everyone for your support of the:

Fatherhood is Leadership Podcast

Because of all of your support, we have reached the New and Noteworthy page on iTunes.

news and noteworthy

Thank you again. If you haven’t already done so, please go to iTunes and give us a rating and review! This will help move the podcast forward so we can continue bringing value and content you love.

Onward and Upward!!!

My TED Talk Takeaways

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Recently, I was honored give a TED talk on fatherhood and leadership at TEDx Boca Raton. As a professional speaker and someone who has watched many TED Talks over the years, it was exciting to be part of such a rich history and tradition.

For those who are unaware of TED, TED is a nonprofit foundation devoted to spreading ideas, usually in the form of short, powerful talks (18 minutes or less). TED began in 1984 as a conference where Technology, Entertainment and Design converged, and today covers almost all topics — from science to business to global issues — in more than 100 languages. Meanwhile, independently run TEDx events help share ideas in communities around the world. The motto of TED is “ideas worth spreading.” You can see for yourself at TED.com.

I have to applaud the organizers of TEDx Boca Raton for putting together a first class event. Everything from the pre-conference VIP party to the event itself was filled with innovative, thoughtful people making the world better.

My talk was titled “The Most Important Question A Father Can Ask Himself,” drawing from my experience developing programs and coaching fathers throughout the globe. And of course my own experience and trials as a modern day Dad!

My idea worth spreading….”Fatherhood is Leadership!”

After a few days processing my time with other thought leaders, scientists, engineers, gamers, child prodigies and former professional athletes, I have a few takeaways from my TED Talk:

  1. Tell and Own Your Story- This applies to a public forum like TED or in everyday life. Our lives are a continuous narrative of the impact we make on people and the world. Be proud of sharing your story, ideas, accomplishments and perceived failures. Tell it, own it and be passionate about your story!
  2. Preparation- There is no substitute for hard work and preparation. Rehearse…Rehearse…Rehearse… Whether its a big speech or boardroom meeting, preparation is the key to success. Nervous energy can be expected but preparation turns that energy into peak performance.
  3. Innovation Can Be Simple The best way to approach complex ideas is to make them simple. Creating an authentic perception and reality of ‘new value’ for the audience is what matters. Remember Albert Einstein’s quote? “If you can’t explain it to a 6-year-old, your don’t understand it yourself.” Just because a topic is complicated, doesn’t mean your talk needs to be complicated—the true mark of good communication is clarity.
  4. Remember “It’s Not About YOU”– Whenever you are asked to deliver a speech, workshop, idea or information don’t lose sight of the goal. For me it’s always to provide value to anyone who has taken the time to listen. When preparing I always ask myself “what’s in it for them?” While you may not reach everyone, you can surely make a difference in at least one persons life that day, if you deliver value.

Do you have a favorite TED Talk or TED takeaway? Let me know by commenting below and feel free to share with others…

If you want more details on how to become a better leader and successfully integrate work-life and home-life, let me help you. For your complimentary discovery session…and to find out about my LEGACY of LEADERSHIP coaching program, I have a limited number of appointments available and requests for people. If you are serious about creating a legacy of leadership, purpose and connection. Contact me

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Fatherhood Thought Leader, Speaker and Leadership Expert Devon Bandison teaches business owners and entrepreneurs around the world how to become better leaders at work and at home. Get his FREE report “Top 4 Way To Become A Productive Leader” at www.devonbandison.com.

5 Ways To Create A Legacy Of Leadership

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“All I ever wanted to do was save my kid…but the ‘my’ kept getting larger and larger”

Geoffrey Canada

Over the past few days, I’ve been In Savannah, Georgia where I was asked to speak at the National Youth-At-Risk Conference. One of the perks of the trip was sharing some time with fellow speaker Geoffrey Canada, founder of the Harlem Children’s Zone.

In our conversation we immediately connected as he learned of my work developing programs throughout the years for children, fathers and families in NYC.

The conversation shifted to this question…What type of legacy are you living today?

LEGACIES ARE CREATED BY LEADERS!

Ask yourself. What is your legacy right now?

If it was all over today, would you be proud of your legacy?

What would your kids, wife, community, colleagues, friends and families say your legacy is?

And most importantly, what would you say it is?

It starts with your WHY!

My early work with clients always starts with finding out what makes them come alive.

What are you passionate about? What is your WHY?

When you start with your WHY you create your own personal mission statement. This establishes a value system and ideal customer.

The next step is to create a living legacy so you can show up as the best version of yourself, wherever you are. Be the leader you want to become at home, at work and in the community!

Here are 5 Steps to creating a Legacy of Leadership:

  1. Vision- Know what matters. You can’t create a legacy and hand something down by accident (if so, it is usually a negative one). Until you have a clear vision of what you want your legacy to be, it will be tough to built it.
  2. Create Winning Habits- Great leaders have “non-negotiables” that they practice on a daily basis. Habits that enhance and support their value system. Drive your personal leadership vision into your life, business, and family by creating habits that support what’s most important.
  3. Connection- All great leaders influence lives through connection. This means spending quality time developing relationships at home, at work, in the community, and with yourself.
  4. Leave Your Comfort Zone– Research shows that in order to maximize performance we need a state of relative anxiety—a space where our stress levels are slightly higher than normal. This space is called “Optimal Anxiety,” and it’s just outside our comfort zone. Optimal anxiety is that place where your mental productivity and performance reach their peak
  5. Bring Value- Most successful people I know don’t think about being successful at all. They think about being of value. They know that when you bring value to a business, relationship, and community you enhance abundance and create reciprocity. (The more you give, the more you receive). The key is to convert value into behaviors that you can measure and manage. Values in action are the key to creating a legacy of leadership.

“Strive not be be a success, but rather to be of value”
Albert Einstein

Super Bowl: 3 Lessons in Leadership!

As Super Bowl XLIX approaches, what has been the major story line for you?

Deflate-gate? New commercials? Office pools? “I’m just here so I won’t get fined?”

All par for the course but if you look a little deeper you’ll find something else…

Lessons in leadership…

While growing up playing sports, coaches always stressed the connection between sports and leadership. As this years Super Bowl approaches it is easy to see the meaningful lessons in leadership exhibited by both teams. Win or lose, these two teams have positioned themselves as the best in class of their profession.

Here are three leadership lessons to pay attention to while you’re watching the game:

  1. Coaching develops talent – One could argue that the teams with the two best coaches in the NFL are in the Super Bowl. Talent development starts with good coaching. Great leaders have great coaches and mentors. If you are ready to take your performance to the next level, invest in a coach that can help you develop.
  2. Focus to finish- It takes vision and discipline to be a winner in sports and in life. Effective leaders follow their vision with a disciplined focus towards achieving a goal. Both teams had a vision of winning the “Big Game” and it was their discipline and focus that has put them in position to win. “A goal is a dream with a deadline.”
  3. Champions never give up– Seattle and New England both went through their share of adversity throughout the season. People were doubting if they would even make the playoffs. But they never gave up, and are now on the biggest stage of their profession. Determination and resoluteness is what allows leaders to remain motivated and to overcome whatever adversity, obstacles and barriers they encounter.

“Leaders aren’t born they are made. And they are made just like anything else, through hard work. And that’s the price we’ll have to pay to achieve that goal, or any goal.”-Vince Lombardi, Hall of Fame NFL Coach

Enjoy the game!

 

Want To Be A Better Father This Year? A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

Want to become a better father?

Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words.

In today’s world where work-life integration is difficult for many, I’ve been fortunate to have the best of both worlds. A career that incorporates the very thing I love most…Fatherhood….

The work with fathers and leaders around the country is an amazing and purposeful journey. An added benefit to this work is the ability to share some of my own experience as a father for them to relate to.

Here are a few pictures over the past year that highlight important fatherhood lessons:

1. Be Consistent- Show Up

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This is what me and my little man call our Friday Night Spot! On Fridays we stop by our favorite pizza shop and have a blast. By making this our special hangout, he looks forward to it and feels special.

Consistency and making your child feel special is important and helps with adjustment. Routines help our children understand what is coming next, so the world doesn’t feel like such a scary and unpredictable place. (warning- It could be fattening too)

2. Encourage and Support Them

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When my daughter was nominated for homecoming Queen, there was a lot of anxiety to go around. She tried to be cool and act as if she wasn’t nervous but as a father you know the “real deal.” We let her know that she is amazing and a winner no matter the outcome. The best moment came when I escorted her on to the field and she turned to me and said “Dad you’ve been treating me like a Queen all my life”

3. Have Fun and Laugh

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This was called the Toys R Us Takeover. Allowing your children to laugh and see the lighter side of you is important. By sharing this side with your children you actually help with their social and emotional development.

Research has shown that children who laugh more are healthier — they’re less likely to be depressed and may even have an increased resistance to illness or physical problems.

4. Teach Them What Gratitude and Service Looks Like

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There’s no better education than seeing the less fortunate first-hand. One way I teach gratitude is by bringing my children to feed and donate gifts to homeless families during the holidays.

Studies show that children who express gratitude through service reap concrete benefits, including greater life satisfaction and a better attitude about school. When children give their time and energy to help others, they’re less likely to take things like health, home and family for granted.

 5. Show Them The World

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Teach your children to follow their dreams and show them the world. They look up to you, so make sure your children know that anything is achievable, regardless of the current circumstances.

Do you have any pictures

depicting fatherhood that

you’d like to share?

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